My Coaching Approach

11 May

Written By Sandi

Adlerian theory is the "grandfather" of many modern practices. It laid the groundwork for:

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): By focusing on how our private logic (thoughts) affects our behavior.
Positive Discipline: Using encouragement rather than punishment in parenting and education.
Holism: Treating the person as a whole entity rather than a collection of symptoms.

We are often taught the Golden Rule as a social obligation, but true Social Interest begins with the courage to be imperfect and the commitment to self-encouragement. Adlerian psychology teaches us that we are not defined by our past, but by the goals we set for our future.

I will help you master the 'Creative Power of the Self' to consciously reshape your Style of Life. By practicing radical honesty, we identify the 'private logic' that holds you back and replace it with behaviors that foster self-worth.

Change is a choice of courage. When you show up for yourself, you are not just changing a habit; you are redefining your Identity—the internal compass that dictates your thoughts, feelings, and how you contribute to the world. Your belief in yourself is the goal that directs your life's movement."

Key Adlerian Concepts Applied

1. The "Style of Life" (Identity)

Adler believed that by age five or six, we create a "Style of Life"—a set of convictions about ourselves and the world. Your idea that "Belief in self is identity" aligns perfectly here. To change the identity, you must change the underlying convictions.

2. The Courage to be Imperfect (Kindness to Self)

Adlerian theory emphasizes Encouragement over praise. Treating yourself with kindness is the act of "encouraging the self," which provides the psychological strength needed to face life's tasks (work, friendship, and love).

3. Teleology (Goal-Orientation)

Adler argued that we are drawn toward our goals (Teleology) rather than pushed by our past.

Your Point: "Belief shapes actions."
Adlerian View: Our "fictional finalism" (the ultimate goal we set for ourselves) is what dictates our current behavior. If your goal is self-kindness, your brain will naturally seek pathways to achieve it.

4. Private Logic vs. Common Sense

"All change begins with being honest with yourself." In Adlerian terms, this is the process of moving from Private Logic (the internal, often irrational excuses we tell ourselves) to Common Sense (socially useful, healthy reality).